UCBW

Yes, YOU TOO can one day become a UCBW MegaStar. Just put your...

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 13:23:18 -0400

Yes, YOU TOO can one day become a UCBW MegaStar. Just put your mind to it, folks.

[via willstorie]

GET YOUR TICKETS NOW! ONLY 14,000 AVAILABLE!

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 02:41:00 -0400

GET YOUR TICKETS NOW! ONLY 14,000 AVAILABLE!

"The sheer chaos, bravado and total disregard for right and wrong the BOB bookers have has always..."

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 12:57:20 -0400

“The sheer chaos, bravado and total disregard for right and wrong the BOB bookers have has always impressed me. It’s like if the Upright Citizens Brigade ran a wrestling promotion.”

- Morton Murphy with a horribly misinformed statement on EWTorch.com

Let’s see you put those words to good use in a comedy wrestling ring, Morton!

Tickets are ON SALE NOW for the fourth annual UCBW ReVengeance...

Thu, 18 Jun 2009 15:49:00 -0400

Tickets are ON SALE NOW for the fourth annual UCBW ReVengeance pay-per-view event, live at midnight, June 27th at the UCBW Arena!

Take a look at this SPECTACULAR poster designed by UCBW MegaStar The Jewish American Princess, who has been taking some computer art classes at Huntington High School.

[via Saber of the Varsity Boys]

Could this be a page from Chuck McMahon’s sketchbook? ...

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 22:42:49 -0400

Could this be a page from Chuck McMahon’s sketchbook? Looks like there were early plans for Wall Street to go shirtless, and for William Burg to be part hippo.

kayfabe:

theduty:

I THINK I GET WRESTLING NOW

Pu Kang Kang’s alter ego was kind enough to blog about...

Tue, 12 May 2009 23:55:00 -0400

Pu Kang Kang’s alter ego was kind enough to blog about this week’s UCBW CageMatch show, and detailed the exciting Improv Division matchup! Also scheduled to appear: Judge Headlock, Wall Street, and “The Grocer” Steve Gristedes in a struggle for the UCBW Hardcore Championship!

eugenecordero:

Come out to Cagematch this week it should be a fun show.

Roo Roo vs Reuben

Thursday May 14th @ 11pm

UCB Theatre NYC

Tickets Here.

UCBW Pay-Per-View preview: WrestleSlamMania IV

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 16:14:00 -0400

Make reservations now! Only 14,000 seats available!

UCBW fans, by now you know that for over three years, you have been able to count on the UCBW to bring you hot comedy wrestling action each and every Thursday night at CageMatch. Tonight UCBW will present it’s signature show — the grandpappy of ‘em all - WrestleSlamMania IV! Rivalries have been brewing, and everything will come to a full boil when the full stable of UCBW MegaStars appears in the squared circle! We’ll be coming at you LIVE on pay-per-view from the world-famous UCBW Arena in New York City. Tensions have been building for two months, and all conflicts will be resolved at the Grandaddy of ‘Em All tomorrow at midnight. Let’s take a look at what’s transpired over the most exciting period in UCBW history.

UCBW CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH:
UNCLE HOLLYWOOD EDDIE (CHAMPION) vs. “THE BLACK PLANET” MARZ (CHALLENGER)

Old friends Uncle Eddie and Marz teamed up in a tag match at the season premiere of CageMatch on February 5th to battle the team of Wall Street and William Burg. They were victorious in their efforts, but after the match Uncle Eddie shockingly turned on Marz, viciously blinding him in one eye. In the weeks since, Uncle Eddie has transformed himself into a new Hollywood persona, proud of his appearance as a background performer in the Academy Award-nominated film “The Wrestler,” among others. On February 19th, after defeating 1980s hero The Blue Bullet, Uncle Hollywood Eddie honored himself with the Oscar for Best Featured Background Performer in a Major Motion Picture. He also debuted his new manager and agent, Gordy Weinstein, distant cousin of famed movie executive Harvey Weinstein. The UCBW Champion has been trash talking Marz for weeks, but The Black Planet has been MIA. This past Thursday, Uncle Eddie thought he was in the clear. With an unsigned contract, and the challenger nowhere to be found, Eddie would not have to defend his belt at WrestleSlamMania. But the half-blind Marz made a shocking return wearing an eyepatch. He attacked the champion, and put his X on the contract. Tonight, Marz looks for revenge against his former ally as he tries to keep the UCBW Championship away from Hollywood, California.

UCBW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP:
THE FRATERNITY (CHAMPIONS) vs. THE MOUNTAIN MEN (CHALLENGERS)

Since debuting over a year ago, The Mountain Men have taken the UCBW by storm. Their unique popularity with the crowd has taken even them by surprise, as the Appalachian warriors have become unconventional fan favorites. On February 12th, Haystack and Hatfield made their intentions known, and challenged the “college boys” of The Fraternity to a match for the UCBW Tag Team Championship. The Fraternity, on the other hand, have been terrorizing the UCBW for nearly two years and last October at AutumnsSlamn they defeated The Unfukwitables to become new Tag Team Champions. Despite their cockiness, The Mountain Men’s challenge went unanswered until March 5th when The Fraternity announced they were declining. The following week, The Mountain Men demanded an opportunity to fight for the belts. So, Little Brother agreed to a compromise: If The Mountain Men were able to defeat the champions and The Varsity Boys in a two-on-four handicap match, The Fraternity would put their titles on the line at WrestleSlamMania. Pulling off the shocking upset, Hatfield pinned Saber while Frat Boy and Little Brother argued with each other. Despite their best efforts, The Fraternity must defend the Tag Team Championship tonight.

THE KING OF HEARTS (w/ The Jewish American Princess) vs. PU KANG KANG

Pu Kang Kang is the original UCBW MegaStar, the first-ever UCBW Champion, The Polynesian Powerhouse, and most importantly, The Kang of the Rang. However, for the last year, the UCBW has been home to another King. The King of Hearts has been blowing kisses to the crowd and intimidating other MegaStars since moving to New York City from Chicago. On February 12th, after being defeated by UCBW Women’s Champion The Lunchlady, The Jewish American Princess revealed her alliance with The King of Hearts. With The JAP in the King’s corner, can Pu Kang Kang keep his crown as ruler of the UCBW?

DR. FUJIMORA’S TIME TRAVEL RUMBLE

Dr. Fujimora, UCBW’s resident mad scientist, will host and referee an elimination match featuring a foursome of MegaStars from different periods of history. Who will emerge victorious from this motley crew: Representing the 1920s, boxer and rabble-rouser Punchmug; representing the 1940s, Jew-in-hiding Anne Frank; representing the 1990s, sitcom star turned evangelical Kirk Cameron; and representing The Recession, the government bailed out Wall Street.

UCBW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP:
THE LUNCHLADY (CHAMPION) vs. MYSTERY OPPONENT (CHALLENGER)

Since defeating Rat Don’t Care in July of last year, The Lunchlady has defeated all challengers to her Women’s Championship. She has even made a short film documenting the friendship she and her title belt share. But at WrestleSlamMania, The Lunchlady will have no opportunity prepare, and the Women’s Championship will be at as much risk as it has ever been. Who is The Lunchlady’s opponent? Will it be The Cat Lady, The Hippie Chick, Mother Nature, or a brand new MegaStar? Will the trusty cookie sheets and sloppy joes be enough? Find out tonight!

SUPERMARKET SWEEP MATCH FOR THE UCBW HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP:
“THE GROCER” STEVE GRISTEDES (CHAMPION) vs. MUSCLES MARINARA (CHALLENGER)

Muscles Marinara debuted at last December’s Hanukkaos by defeating Johnny Wimbledon, and had his sophomore appearance on March 5th defeating The Varsity Boys in a two-on-one handicap match. Steve Gristedes, on a constant quest to shut down the UCBW, has become an active competitor determined to stop comedy wrestling once and for all. On February 26th, he announced his desire to become Hardcore Champion, and on March 12th The Cowboy answered his challenge demanding an impromptu matchup. The Cowboy had been Hardcore Champion since I Am Slam lost the title in a triple threat match also featuring The Grocer in April of last year. This time Gristedes had a secret weapon, The Bagboys, which was too much for the fun-lovin’ Cowboy to overcome. At WrestleSlamMania, the Hardcore Championship will be defended in a Supermarket Sweep Match with all grocery items as legal weapons, and the winner must dump his opponent in a shopping cart.

REFEREE PAT BAER’S SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

UCBW official for the past four years, Referee Pat Baer has been nowhere to be found since Uncle Eddie attacked him at the CageMatch season premiere on February 5th. Rumor has it Baer will make an historic announcement that will shake the UCBW to its core. Word says he has had enough of being attacked, and will do the only thing he can to prevent it from happening again. What could the Referee possibly say that would cause such a stir?

CHUCK MCMAHON IS BACK

Fan favorite UCBW owner Chuck McMahon made his first appearance at CageMatch in 2009 this past Thursday defeating Kirk Cameron. It was announced that Chuck is now forced to compete for cash, because he has lost his entire three million dollar fortune in the Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme. Will McMahon wrestle in a match to earn the money he needs to survive? Rumor has it he will call out Madoff himself to settle the score.

For the FOURTH unprecedented year, UCBW WrestleSlamMania is the most highly-anticipated event in UCBW history, and it is not to be missed!

Make reservations now! Only 14,000 seats available!

The Apiary: The Road to WrestleSlamMania IV

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 12:13:00 -0400

The Apiary: The Road to WrestleSlamMania IV:

Legendary New York City comedy blog The Apiary has a fantastic and comprehensive look at tonight’s big show. Get an rare peak into the behind-the-scenes world of your favorite comedy wrestling league, UCBW!

And get your tickets for WrestleSlamMania IV right here, the UCBW Arena will be sure to sell out! TONIGHT @ MIDNIGHT.

Chuck McMahon returns this Saturday at WrestleSlamMania IV! ...

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 14:44:30 -0400

Chuck McMahon returns this Saturday at WrestleSlamMania IV! After having defeated a SnakeMan, a baker made of cake, an evil train conductor, and an evil grocery store manager, what will he say to the capacity crowd in the UCBW Arena? Get your tickets for WrestleSlamMania IV now!

charlietodd:

Here’s a video of my comedy wrestling match from AutumnSlamn a few months back. Chuck McMahon (me) vs. Steve Gristedes (played by Joe Spellman) in a “Stepladder Match” for the deed to the building. Shot and edited by someguys.tv

If you’re in town this Saturday at Midnight, come see the UCBW’s latest Pay-Per-View, WrestleSlamMania IV. It’s $5. Beer is $2. I promise it will be a good time.

Reserve tickets.

The biggest comedy wrestling pay-per-view is only 16 days away...

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 20:47:18 -0500

The biggest comedy wrestling pay-per-view is only 16 days away at the world famous UCBW Arena in the shadow on Madison Square Garden!

Featuring the main event - Hollywood Uncle Eddie defends the UCBW Heavyweight Championship against The Black Planet Himself, Marz! Stay locked into UCBW.info for the rest of the tremendous card of matches!

Only 14,000 seats available! Get your tickets now!

[poster design by Adam Bozarth]

FROM THE VAULT!: The Polynesian Powerhouse reminds young women...

Tue, 03 Mar 2009 14:53:00 -0500

FROM THE VAULT!: The Polynesian Powerhouse reminds young women about an important danger.

patbaer:

UCBW CARES: Pu Kang Kang Edition

just watched all of these again today. Still my favorite.

Many thanks to our new video production team, Some Guys and...

Tue, 17 Feb 2009 15:53:04 -0500

Many thanks to our new video production team, Some Guys and Their Cameras, for shooting our AutumnSlamn pay-per-view extravagangza back in October of 2008. They did a fantastic job. Here’s a teaser of the event featuring all your favorite UCBW MegaStars!

The Lunchlady’s video blog from tonight’s UCBW...

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 02:30:07 -0500

The Lunchlady’s video blog from tonight’s UCBW CageMatch on February 12th, 2009! The Women’s Champion then went on to defeat the debuting MegaStar, The Jewish American Princess, despite interference from The King of Hearts. Have The King of Hearts and The JAP formed a Royal Court?

[via bridgecomedy]

UCBW Champion Uncle Eddie turns his back on the fans and his...

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 17:36:00 -0500

UCBW Champion Uncle Eddie turns his back on the fans and his country as he betrays his friend and tag team partner Marz by blinding him! Spit Brunkle and The Captain comment on the indicent in shocked disbelief.

Photo by Keith Huang

UCBW CageMatch 2.5.09 - Fourth Season Premiere!

The Black Planet Himself, Marz, connects with The Final Orbit...

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 17:35:00 -0500

The Black Planet Himself, Marz, connects with The Final Orbit onto Wall Street.

Photo by Keith Huang

UCBW CageMatch 2.5.09 - Fourth Season Premiere!

William Burg, hailing from Bushwick, makes his debut in the...

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 17:34:00 -0500

William Burg, hailing from Bushwick, makes his debut in the UCBW.

Photo by Keith Huang

UCBW CageMatch 2.5.09 - Fourth Season Premiere!

UCBW CageMatch preview: February 5th '09 -- Season Premiere!

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 17:52:25 -0500

Well wrestling fans, the wait is over. After only a brief re-emergence in December for Hanukkaos III, the UCBW is back in action for the first time since AutumnSlamn back in October! The UCBW has undergone many changes since then: The Fraternity have proven their dominance by becoming new UCBW Tag Team Champions, Father Time’s own father was called out by WWE Superstar Kane, and Anne Frank defeated Adolf Hitler to win a UCBW contract.

But as much as things change, the more they stay the same. Uncle Eddie is still the UCBW World Heavyweight Champion, and he will be in action tonight to kick off the UCBW’s unprecented FOURTH season! Uncle Eddie and Marz will join forces in an epic tag team battle to face Wall Street and the debuting hipster William Burg. In addition, both Marz and Uncle Eddie say they have announcements that will shape the entire UCBW landscape for 2009. What bombshells will they drop?

Referee Pat Baer will also be in the UCBW Arena. Word has been that his days as a comedy wrestling official might be coming to an end. Will Referee Pat Baer speak about the whispers of his retirement? Will the capacity crowd demand a dance? And, as always, the Voices of the UCBW - TT Billingsworth & The Captain - will be in the UCBW Arena to call all the action!

There’s only one way to see all the action!

Make reservations now!

Improv Division: Hot Sauce (champion, 0-0) vs. Bastian (challenger, 0-0)

An Open Letter to Robert Reich by Glenn Jacobs Recently, Kane of...

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 08:14:00 -0500

An Open Letter to Robert Reich by Glenn Jacobs

Recently, Kane of the WWE (UCBW’s only true industry competition) took it upon himself to write a very antagonistic letter to Grandfather Time, father of UCBW MegaStar Father Time! Rumor has it that Father Time is not pleased, and has called out Kane to settle these matters in a comedy wrestling ring! Will Kane respond to Father Time’s challenge? The ball is in his court.

[via Referee Pat Baer]

To the delight of the sold out crowd in the UCBW Arena, Anne...

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 17:07:00 -0500

To the delight of the sold out crowd in the UCBW Arena, Anne Frank saves Hanukkah with a Hanukkaos miracle. She defeats six other prospective MegaStars in the main event to win a UCBW contract. Here she is hugging Rudolph as Santa looks on. Get ready for an exciting 2009, comedy wrestling fans!

Hanukkaos III, 12/20/08

Photo by Katie Sokoler

No stranger to losing, Adolf must reluctantly accept yet another...

Tue, 23 Dec 2008 17:03:42 -0500

No stranger to losing, Adolf must reluctantly accept yet another defeat at the hands of the Jews.

Hanukkaos III, 12/20/08

Photo by Katie Sokoler